Monday, 9 December 2013

Living in the Past - A Groovy Education

(Bev and Carol are characters from my two (soon to be three) humorous memoirs.  See right side panel for links.)

Three years at university were awesome (always wanted to use that word and now feel strangely let down).

But… they very nearly didn’t happen!

First off, (excuses, excuses) didn’t get the grades I wanted.  Big surprise. Blame (oh, there has to be blame!) psychological torture and lack of faith on part of  middle-class educational establishment of the elite, grammar school variety.

Other possible factors: hedonistic tendencies, narcissistic wearing out of mirrors, lack of ‘application’ (memories of comments in margins – notably: ‘satisfactory’, 'grammar?'  'No!'), plus, penchant for copying out tedious articles from Reader’s Digest for school projects, notably: ‘Write about a Favourite Holiday Destination (with pictures)’ – Afghanistan was a bad choice, even in the seventies, (excellent drawing of camel, although  can now reveal it was traced…from National Geographic). 

Unfortunately, was pigeonholed (nice but dim) and packed off to secretarial school (bilingual course) clutching two (not three) A’ levels, having been ASSURED by elements of  afore-mentioned establishment that university entry was, is and will always remain the domain of the THREE A’-levelled candidate.  (Dubious compound).

This turned out to be a BIG LIE. 

Two years later, after exercising accredited secretarial skills in various contexts, most boringly as  legal dogsbody and appalling speller/typist, it was back to the drawing board.  Duly informed by (normally unreliable) friend that university entry was and always had been viable with only TWO A’ levels. 


Strangulation of former headmistress and/or careers’ advisor impracticable and, arguably, disproportionate.

Sulking ensued.  Much contemplation, much going down pub.

Eventually, arrived at decision – would make belated application to take up  place at Keele University (famous for lakes) to study English and French literature, with subsidiary Astronomy (one science subject required).  Astronomy least frightening/prettiest.

From 1977 – 1980 undergraduate/scholar/bimbo/jam aficionado and expert in procrastination. 

Will attempt to record best bits in coming weeks, months, years.  Bouts of lethargy, extreme alternative activity and/or mood swings may result in casual scheduling of posts.

To be continued…

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