Episode Ten
Netball match disaster.
Mini bus arrived late and Janice (captain), not pleased. Got lost.
Janice still not pleased. Surly greeting at College by MAMMOTH
opposition. Janice exercised
self-restraint. Lots of eyeballing.
Changed into kit and realised had forgotten regulation
knickers. Not quite G string, but
close. Would have to do. Girl marking
me similar to annoying and very hefty shadow of orangutan. Hairy, orange,
moustachioed mammal with size ten feet.
No love lost, but…
Lost face, lost tempers, lost match. Carol aglow with indignation. Language on bus back, inventive.
Back to Room to commence essay on use of imagery in
Chaucer. Went to sleep by
accident. Still two days before
deadline. Bleached roots, waited for
Carol for nighttime sortie.
Gig at Union. UB40
(never heard of them), plus support.
Wore white crepe blouse as dress, black shiny leggings,
silver headband and dangly earrings.
Had eaten nothing all day.
Excellently flat stomach. Carol
in stretch jeans and boob-tube (borrowed from me). Staggeringly beautiful.
Onto campus.
Freezing to death. Cider and
boogie warmed us up until arrival of support band. Spotted lead guitar player and formulated plan.
Had it. Flaunted
it.
Pursued by rock god and invited to London following month –
to recording studios. Put phone number
in pocket and spent rest of evening with James. Blonder than me, taller than me, more gorgeous than me, more
besotted than me. Result!
Carol with Dave.
Great evening.
Saw drop-dead gorgeous Jerry and scary serial stalker
John. Regrets and relief in equal
quantities. Magpie tendencies quelled
due to non-stop devotion of new musical friend.
Next morning wrote essay in two hours. Unfortunately, received appalling
grade. Unsupported drivel,
apparently. Must do better.
Happy days.
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